Thoughtful Thursday: How do you speak to your kids?

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When I saw this quote on Instagram, I paused.

Immediately I sat down and evaluated myself. 

Honestly.

When I had Jeremiah; I was very tough on him from when he could start to properly communicate (in his case it was more non verbal)
but he acted out A LOT--tantrums, throwing things, trashing rooms... yeah...
But by the grace of God, with some tough love at the beginning; and now he's able to speak more and express himself a little more, I'm not as tough as I was before. I did do a lot of shouting, punishments and the like-- but what I've seen is that as your child grows... they change, so you can't always handle them the way you handled them when they were a different age!

With Matthew; I was a little more lenient with him because he was a bit calmer and a lot more quieter than Jeremiah.. but as he's nearing 3.. his personality is showing out more and I need to be a little tougher on him in certain areas!

But because of how I was with Jeremiah.. I don't shout. I'm very expressive.. so I've got some faces I make that they know "Uh oh..." lol. 
But I try to TALK to the boys more than shout at them.. because I realized at some point Jeremiah was shouting at me! And I was like Ohhh hell naw! But obviously, he's emulating what he sees.. so he was learning it from me! (I had to correct that Q U I C K L Y !)

Gonna be very real.. I do still shout when I'm at the breaking point of my patience/frustration; but then I catch myself-- sometimes I don't and correct myself the next time.

I don't want my kids to remember me as "Oh mummy used to always shout and scream at me" 

Nah. Obviously there will be some moments, but I don't want that to become a normality.

All I want as a mum is for God to keep on dropping wisdom to me to handle my boys the way he wants me to; make sure they're good boys that make a difference and for them not to be boxed into that 'black boy' stereotype

Just as the kids grow and change and learn, me as a mother I'm growing and learning too! And there's nothing wrong with that.

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