Dee: (The) Mama Blog

Ha! A break? I don't think I've had a break since 2016! The mama's that have partners... it's so funny to look at them have the luxury to say to you "I'm just relaxing upstairs" or "If you need me i'm upstairs" or better yet, "I'm going to sleep" I don't think any of these words have had the opportunity to leave my mouth. If I go upstairs... it's to use the toilet; and little hands and feet are right on my butt. I'm not 'relaxing' upstairs, I'm putting clothes away, changing bedsheets, or cleaning the bathroom. If I'm going to 'sleep' I'm putting the kids to sleep, rather. It is really a 24/7/365 kind of job, motherhood.. the only break is literally when we've finally decided to go to sleep! Even that sometimes gets disrupted; if it's one of those nights where your child is waking up every hour; or if they're teething so their sleep is disrupted, or if they're g...

"I think your child is hungry" His warm breath passes through my ears. I look at him from the side of my eye and smile. "Thank you. He's already eaten." "Your child is crying, he sounds really upset" I start to speak through my grinning teeth. "Thank you for your concern, sir." The child stops crying. She gets up and covers her child with a blanket, as well as placing another blanket under his head. She stares the gentleman in his eyes as she sits back down in her seat.

I've been in such a deep state of thought for the past couple of weeks since this whole George Floyd murder.. Racism is still evident.. it never disappeared. But racism is NOT something that you're born with.. it's something that is taught. How can children not like other children of a different skin colour? Are they even paying attention to that? They are children-- all they want to do is play! And it just goes to show that we as parents have ALOT of responsibility to uphold; we must teach them the right ways and not follow the generations before us. I am so hurt and emotional because I have two boys.. who are black.. and it just makes me wonder how is it going to be when they are older? How is the world going to be then? Will racism be worse than it is now? Will it be better? Will the world have been delivered from that mindset of skin colour? Only God knows.

Sounds like a silly question doesn't it? But let me tell you something... 99 percent of the time I look and a feel a hot MESS. If it's not the bags under my eyes.. it's my bloodshot eyes.. if it's not my bloodshot eyes.. it's the fact I'm a walking zombie because I'm running on 4 hours of sleep. But that is my fault.. I take my mummy time very seriously and cherish every minute I have to myself. But you get the point. As mum's we don't have a lot of opportunities to get dressed up and go out without our kids attached to our legs.. But it's not even just that.. just general self care has to be carefully organized and planned. I remember when I just had my first son, Jeremiah.. I just about had self care down.. I'd be able to do my hair mask when he's down for his nap.. apply it to my hair.. and then keep it in my hair. Baby wakes up... and when I put him down to sleep.. I wash the hair mask out and do my normal hair care routine. ...

"How are you?" "I'm good.. the kids are good, you know the other day--" "No. no. How are YOU?" "Me?"  "Yes, you." "Tired. Run down. Do you not see the bags under my eyes?" "Yes. which is why I asked." "Besides the normality of motherhood, I am really good. Honestly. I really can't complain" "I'm so glad to hear that."

Sometimes I think back to when my boys had colds/flu.. in particular when my eldest had chicken pox before he even turned one.. and I felt so helpless. I had to just sit and watch him itch and itch and I couldn't do anything about it. I couldn't make it magically go away... he had to go through it. (The most I could do was put calamine lotion on him!!) But it's so hard to watch your children in pain or ill and there's not much you can do. We just have to let them soldier through it. There was a time Jeremiah was ill for nearly a week.. and literally all he was doing was sleeping. He would eat a little.. drink a little.. and sleep. Wake up.. drink a little.. go back to sleep. He had a temperature that wasn't going.. and he was sleeping. I got him checked out.. and literally I had to just watch him get over it. It was a viral kind of sickness and you know with viruses they have to do its course.. we can't stop it.. But as a parent you always wish that you c...

I have CONSTANTLY been saying this on my Instagram on a lot of my posts.. and I'm going to now break it down just a little for you guys to just get a taste of what we go through... and if you are already a boy mama or you have a son.. you already know the deal! As you know through the whole quarantine period.. the kids have definitely been driven up the wall.. and driving me up the wall too... For the past week or so.. my boys have been picking fights with each other... Yeah. You heard me. Picking. Fights. They would be playing one minute.. and the next one of them is slapping one in the face.. then kicking.. then wrestling. Hoo lawd. And it literally starts from NOWHERE. I can just be sitting down with them.. then one of them will get up and slap one in the face. And I'm like 'WHOA. Don't do that!" Sometimes I'm like.. are they getting tired of these four walls? Honestly.. I do find it hilarious-- the other day my youngest just did a forward rol...

"Stick your tongue out, aaaah" "Aaaah" He closes his mouth on the toothbrush. "No, keep your mouth open" "Aaaah" He closes his mouth again. "Keep. your. mouth. OPEN." "Open. Aaah" "Good. Keep it like that. Now spit!" "Good boy! Clap for yourself!"

I was doing something so silly the other night in my "Mummy time". Mummy time is basically when I have alone time to think... recharge. regroup and just enjoy my own company without two small toddlers running around screaming the house down! I was literally calculating how old I'll be and how old my children will be in like 10, 15 years. I'm 31.. (32 next month.. eek!).. so in 15 years I'm going to be 46! and in 15 years my kids will be 18 and 17. Hooo my gawd! And it just made me think.. maybe I should of planned to have kids earlier. But to be honest God has a time for everything and everyone in life-- and I really don't think I would have been able to finish college/uni if I had kids younger. Because the way that I get so distracted by them and lose focus I think it would have taken a long time to get back into education and get all of the qualifications that I gained now. There are some people that can give birth young and still do everything I...

Having children personally has actually made me realize certain things that I've been doing for so long that isn't very good. What I'm talking about on this occasion is kissing my teeth. It's something I do without even thinking-- I do it when I'm concentrating.. I do it when I'm frustrated.. I do it when I'm bored for goodness sake lol! Now... the moment I realized '"Oh no" was when my 3 year old did something really naughty.. and I told him off.. I kissed my teeth.. and he copied the sound! I did a double take and told him 'Don't make that sound!" But isn't it funny how we're the one with the bad habits.. and we're always doing it.. but we will quickly correct our kids? We don't want our kids to do the bad habits that we have adopted from childhood or even adulthood... this is why we always need to be checking ourselves because we are our children's first role model.  They see us everyday, every night-- every ...

"Can you get down!" "No!" "Don't make me come over there. 5.. 4... 3.." His little feet thud on the ground and he runs off into the next room. "You too! Don't follow what he is doing!" He giggles and climbs behind the chair. "Come from back there! It's cold!" "Don't throw that at the TV" She picks up the blocks that have been thrown around and puts it on the table. "Do not touch these blocks" she says as she plops in the chair Blocks are flying in the air. He throws his water bottle on the floor. He climbs behind the chair again. I'm tired of talking...

I was sitting down reflecting on this entire pandemic and what a lot of people have been going through.. losing loved ones etc.. and despite whatever else I may be going through.. myself and my family are healthy, happy and protected. I took my boys to the park the other week and they were so happy to just be outdoors... and run around because I've really just been taking them to play in the garden which isn't even remotely the same as the park! They kept running around to other children they were seeing.. and one of their parents was like 'They don't understand social distancing" one side of my mind I was like "Wow... they're kids... they just know about playing" How can kids social distance? But anyway. I digress. You maybe going through other situations.. or other problems; but even despite the time we are in, be thankful and absolutely grateful that you have yourself, your family intact, healthy and protected.

There's a lot that we find out once we give birth to children. No one told you about the healing process. No one told you about that first fire poo you need to pass after you've had a child.. And no one seemed to enlighten us on the fact even way after you have a child you still get moments where you can wee on yourself! You heard me! Do you ever get moments where you've just cough that BIT too hard. or you sneeze multiple times and all of a sudden you feel some wee come out of Ms. Gina without any warning. Yeah.. it's great isn't it? Not. It's called stress incontinence and believe it or not a lot of women go through it but don't want to talk about it. It's nothing to be ashamed of. It's one of the many things that we are left with after child birth. Our pelvic floor has been weakened squeezing those lovely baby heads out... and it will take some time for them to be strengthened again. When we're in the hospital they do advise us to do pelvic ...